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Coffee Jokes
All the best Coffee Jokes, allin one place to keep you laughing for hours.
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I drink coffee for your protection.
First I drink the coffee. Then I do the things.
Decaf? That’s just bean water betrayal.
Coffee, because murder is illegal.
Without coffee, I’m basically a decorative pillow.
I’m espresso-ly fond of you.
Better latte than never.
Don’t worry, be frappe.
You mocha me crazy.
Words cannot espresso how much you bean to me.
I wonder of coffee thinks of me too
Don’t be depresso, have an espresso.
Thanks a latte.
I’m feeling brew-tally honest today.
Sip happens.
My blood type is dark roast.
I don’t rise and shine. I caffeinate and hope.
Coffee: Because 7 a.m. is rude.
The only thing brewing faster than coffee is my bad attitude without it.
I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without it.
I function on caffeine and sarcasm.
My brain has a loading screen before coffee.
This meeting could have been a coffee.
Coffee is cheaper than therapy.
This spreadsheet needs espresso.
I don’t clock in. I brew in.
My productivity is directly proportional to caffeine levels.
Coffee breaks are my cardio.
Work without coffee? Grounds for resignation.
I have a latte on my plate.
I attend meetings for the coffee.
I’m not late. I was brewing.
I love you more than coffee… almost.
We’re in a brew-mance.
Love at first sip.
I like my coffee like I like my humor, dark.
I have trust issues with decaf.
Coffee never ghosts me.
Coffee makes my heart skip a beat… medically concerning, but worth it.
My love language is refills.
Decaf is just coffee’s evil twin.
Coffee is the Wi-Fi of life.
If in doubt, add coffee.
I’m running on fumes and French roast.
Dark roast, darker humor.
Espresso is just concentrated ambition.
A yawn is a silent scream for coffee.
Coffee: because naps are frowned upon at work.
I’ve got 99 problems but coffee solves most of them.
Coffee, the glue holding my life together.
A balanced diet is coffee in both hands.
My coffee is hotter than my temper.
I’m not shaking. I’m vibrating with enthusiasm.
I sip, therefore I am.
Bean there, brewed that.
I run on Dunkin’ and pour decisions.
The early bird gets the coffee.
I came. I saw. I caffeinated.
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